Pull up a chair,
Pour yourself a drink,
Make yourself comfortable,
Give me a minute, let me think,
It’s a long story,
Complicated, but true,
About a relationship,
Between me and you
It began at age fourteen,
I signed and you beckoned,
I can still taste it now,
And drink more than I reckoned,
My old man brewed it at home,
It was always on tap,
I drank Brown Ale,
His bitter was crap,
Kimberley Nut Brown,
Was the name of the brew,
Another pint please Landlord,
Ready as ever, always on cue,
One after the other,
And then one for the road,
No lock in tonight?
In this humble abode,
1am,2am, later for some,
Time for a chaser, better make that two,
Too much for part timers,
That was my point of view,
Each night was the same,
Drink plenty, them some,
Off home to bed,
To sleep I’d succumb,
Up North they call it Newcastle Brown Ale,
The best pint in the land they assumed,
I can testify to this claim,
By the amount I readily consumed,
So began our love affair,
I would take hold of you every night,
You always tickled my taste buds,
My palate was yours to excite,
But sadly, or so I am informed,
All good things must come to an end,
So in the foreseeable future,
When we meet it will be as good friends.
Just a little ditty about my former battles with The Dog. My favourite tipple is brown ale, commonly known in the North East as The Dog. I have a love for this drink, that also has a love of me. I seldom drink it anymore, for it does tend to make me do stupid things in any kind of quantity. Now I just have the occasional bottle and leave it at that. More would signal disaster, and I have learnt my lesson on that one. Still Love the stuff though.
A couple of pointers,
1; A lock in is drinking in a pub after official closing times. Thankfully, in the UK, that no longer applies.
2; Home Brew is literally that, Beer that you brew at home. It all comes in a little kit. Just mix up the contents, add sugar and leave for anything from a day to a month before it is fit for consumption. Some brews are very strong.
3; Sadly, since Newcastle Breweries were bought by another company, Newcastle Brown Ale is no longer brewed in Newcastle.
4; A chaser is a drink to accompany a pint. We are served pints in the UK, a chaser is a small whiskey or its like to drink alongside a pint.
5; Kimberley Nut Brown is no longer made by the Kimberley Brewery as the Brewery itself no longer exists. My local pub when I was in my teens, stocked a crate of Kimberley Nut Brown a month, before I came along, lol, then it went up to 3×15 bottle crates a week.
6; Landlord is the owner or tenant of a public house [pub] in the UK.
7; I signed on for a local football team [soccer to the heathens] whose HQ was the Durham Ox pub. When I arrived to sign, the team manager asked me if I wanted a drink and he bought me my very first pint of Kimberley Nut Brown. So he is to blame!
8; The Blaydon Races is a very famous song about a yearly event in the North East of England. It is regularly sung at Newcastle United football matches. It would take far to long to explain the whole song here, maybe thats for another time. Hopefully you get the gyst of it though. The local dialect and some words might be difficult to understand.