The Fightback


Seated in the usual position,
The grooves almost cut into the carpet
Noses through the spindles
The raised voices of anger
Words, base and harsh
Waiting now
For the inevitable
Tomorrow, the bruises will tell
Their own story.

Where are you today?
Why are you not here as you should be?
No treats today, no ride in a car
No film to enjoy at the Savoy
Just another dreary
Saturday afternoon
Same as every other dreary day
We miss you, I miss you
You should be here.

The Sudan, where is that?
Locust, what are they?
Desert, whats a desert?
How long for?
Will you write or maybe
send a postcard?
We will miss you, I will miss you

The presents as usual
The caravan as usual
or should we rightfully say mobile home?
Rain, incessant, pounding the roof
Chess, Happy Families [fucking joke that one is]
Fizzy pop, too many sweets
Back by five
Then how long until we see you again?

You took me in, gave me shelter
But below the surface
it was just the same person I had been warned about
I never believed or heeded those warnings
but they were true, all of them
then, I grew to hate you for real

The fateful day
Me, the usual atagonistic child, not a boy,
not a man, not even quite a teen
But bitter already, cynical
No child should be that way at such a tender age
but I guess thats life
I dont want to fight anymore
I am tired
But you will not strike me again
Not this time.

The streets, cold, dark, lonely
Anger, fear, hatred
Burning in the depths of my soul
No outlet
You threw me out you bastard
Because I would not bow down to your fucking ego
Because I had learnt to fight back
and you could not handle it
Some fucking man you are

The real hurt, the hurt I never thought
anyone could inflict upon another
came when you didn’t recognise your own son
that fateful day
he knocked upon the door he remembered so well
You should of just killed me there and then
Like a punch drunk pugilist
I doubt I shall ever recover from that one
I am unknown to my own father
How could you do that to me?
After all the crap that went before
How could you do it?

So goodbye
I am lost to you forever now
I am no longer
your son
You are certainly not
A father
for me to be proud of!

Posted for patrons of the pub over at dVerse where we are prompted to think back to a time before today and use a memory to base our offering around. Maybe you will join us and offer something of your own?

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About Tino

Fighting to save the sanity of a slightly demented forty something, who is fast approaching becoming a more than slightly demented fifty something ;-) View all posts by Tino

16 responses to “The Fightback

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