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Friends Are Not Just For Christmas

No one told me life was gonna be this way

No, no, no, not that friends, just friends!

I just read a fantastic poem concerning friendships and how they often go wrong.


Take a look, its worth it.

But it got me to thinking about friends and just who and what they are.

I worked with a lad a few years ago. We became good mates, then friends. Mate and friend are different in this neck of the woods. But I was proud to call this man a friend. I have/had loads of mates, but friends are often thin on the ground throughout my life. I like people, mostly, but I am also happy in my own company, which is a good thing!! after what happened 3 1/2 years ago.

Me and my colleague met once a week, away from work, shared a beer or three and a spliff or 10 and had a good laugh. It was always at his house as I was the one with transport. Our friendship became so good, I am godfather to his first daughter. I used to go every week, without fail to see them. I would be there from 5pm through to midnight or more. I always had a good time. The little one was a very happy, content child and she came to me easily when I visited. She used to love taking everything out of my shirt pocket [phone, ID card, pens, notes etc] and then putting them all back again. She would do that for hours if you let her.

Then sadly, I became ill and had to stop going to see them. I was a wreck of my former self, could not walk, let alone drive, and I was messed up in the head, bigtime.

Three and a half years later, this man I was proud to call a friend has been to see me once. Not one phone call in that time. I am angry and upset at this situation, but am powerless to change it. I quit smoking and due to meds, hardly ever drink now. I still dont work or drive.

Throughout these last 3 1/2 years, one man stepped up to the plate. I knew him for years at work. We said hello, exchanged a gripe or two, worked together on occasion, but that was all. This man started to come to see me when I was first off work. He is a big fella with a heart of gold. I never asked him to come, he just did. The more we talked, the more we had in common. We have a cuppa, put the world to rights, gossip [yeah, men do that as well] and just shoot the breeze and have a laugh. He even brings me a little present, a chocolate bar, or a new drink thats hit the market. He even sends me a christmas card these days. He offers to take me and my partner out if we need, or take us shopping, things like that. He really helps me keep my sanity, he is obviously crazier than I am 😉

So, the man who I called a friend, simply wasn’t. He only lives about 3 miles away but can’t be arsed to even phone and see how I am. The big ginger fella has been a complete suprise to me. I have known him a long time, shared the odd beer with him, but he shows he cares, enough, to give up his free time to listen to me moaning.

Good friends, real friends are hard to find. If you have some, cherish them, make as much effort as they do and go out of your way for them if the situation requires it.

I have also known a lot of people online. They come, they go, but few are real and even fewer hang around. But, there is always the exception to the rule and they know who they are!

Find me a friend
Real, true, lifelong
Indomitable to the
Neglect them not
Defend them as you would a child
Savor them, protect them

Abide their faults
Relish their candor
Exculpate their errors

Nurture the relationship
Offer it sustenance
Treasure it

Juxtapose with
Unite with
Share with
Treat with respect


Show that you care about THEM!